Javier Bardem was a badass in No Country for Old Men despite that ridiculous hairdo. Tim Urban is hoping his mop top will distract America, if not the judges, on American Idol. Zac Efron looks prettier than Vanessa Hudgens with his ladylocks. Let’s face it: a bowl cut only looks cool on Dorothy Hamill (but then, anything would look cool on Dorothy Hamill).
Justin, dear, sweet, chipmunk-cheeked Justin, are you trying to cover your face so tween girls won’t realize that you’re an animated Disney character? Are you hiding a ginormous zit on your forehead? Did you get tired of holding up a sign that said, “Kick my ass”?Baby, cut your hair. One time. It’s like the teenage version of a combover. I’m beginning to think “Never Let You Go” isn’t about an 8th grader, but your bangs.