Monday, April 13, 2009

People who never carry cash

I understand the appeal of the debit or credit card. It’s a lot easier to track on Quicken. You can travel light. Believe me, I get it. I use my debit card…a lot. But there’s a time and a place to whip it out, and it’s not when you’re splitting a bar tab ten ways. If you know you’re going out with a large group of people, for the love of all things holy, stuff a wad of bills down your pants.

And believe it or not, there are still a few places that only accept cash and checks. I choke back my two cents every time I find myself at one of these joints with someone who doesn’t have a lick of cash on them. My choices are few: I wait for them to go to an ATM or I float them the cash and then I wind up looking like a dick three weeks later when I ask for the money back and they don’t remember—and they still don’t have any coin on them. Asking for the third or fourth time, I sound like a tightwad tool. And more often than not, I forget that I loaned them money and I’m just hosed.

The only thing to do is to gather up my change in a sock and float one last loan. Just let me know where on your body you’d like me to deposit this hefty sum. And don't worry about repayment. This one's free of charge.

(photo: baserinstincts.com)

12 comments:

Julia said...

I'm guilty. I always try to have cash, but sometimes I have spent my last $$$ and forget or don't get to the ATM. However, I would never go to dinner after which I need to split the bill without $$$$.

Tommy said...

The other scenario is a strip club. You can't tip a stripper with a debit card.

(Or maybe you can these days. It's been a long time.)

Whit said...

I think I'll start carrying around of a sock of change for just such situations. I got your FriendTM right here ...

Anonymous said...

Tommy, the bars in those clubs no longer give you change in singles. You get two-dollar bills (yes, they are still printed). That basically doubles the minimum tip you can give the strippers.

Sewfast said...

I had something witty to say, but Tommy just stopped me cold! Too funny!

Sarah (pointypen.com) said...

Don't forget thrift stores. Larger chains like Goodwill do take debit and credit, but the small, hole in the wall store where I shop doesn't even have card readers. Last week, I got stuck in line behind a group of people who had debit cards, but not enough cash to cover their bill.

If you don't carry enough cash on your person to cover a THRIFT-STORE purchase, you fail at life.

Nora said...

"If you don't carry enough cash on your person to cover a THRIFT-STORE purchase, you fail at life." - Sarah

This is my quote of the week.

lindamade said...

ugh, i'm with you. i always carry cash...and i always end up footing the bill.

on the same note, i hate when someone keeps mentioning that they "had" the money they owed me but then they didn't see me that day and bought lunch instead. WTF. ugh.

Chris said...

HAAA! I love this! But don't read the About Me section on my blog, because you'd have another blog subject, there.

Here's what I HATE. And you can use this. I know you take submissions, but I'm very very busy and can't write a blog post even though I've just spent 75 minutes reading your blog and commenting and you are SICK of me. But, here's what bugs the shit out of me:

okay, I forgot.

Chris said...

oh, yeah!

What gripes MY rear is people who have been STANDING (fergiv my caps) in a LINE at the grocery store for 20 minutes to buy something, and when they get to the register... when they GET to the FUCKING REGISTER, they have to UNZIP their purse or slowly PULL OUT the wallet from their ass and open the wallet and look in the wallet and look at the register total and look in the wallet and pull out the cash and it's not enough and they get a check out and then they start writing it, or maybe they have an ATM card and they have to find it, because they tucked it safely away between the Barnes and Noble card and the Membership Card to Supercuts, and they just---can't---find---it, and they aren't sure what they want to do, and the clerk is standing there trying not to look at the customer because s/he would be reduced to killing the customer and then self.

Did they NOT KNOW that they were going to BUY something? Did they not KNOW that when the clerk was done running things through the robot, that they would be asked to give over some payment of some kind of legal variety? I don't understand what people are DOING the previous ten minutes while they're standing in line. Are they thinking deep thots? Are they repressing gas? Are they trying to figure out whether the person in front of them has eleven items? I mean, I could SCREAM!

But your point about the cash... Well made!

kandeland said...

guilty this time! xo natalea

Anonymous said...

"Just let me know where on your body you’d like me to deposit this hefty sum."

That of course would be a LUMP sum.