Are you having an allergic reaction? Can you even see through those slits you call eyes? What are you so fucking smug about? Bridget Jones Diary and Chicago were a longgggg time ago, sweetcheeks. Maybe you’re worried about the recession and you’re storing nuts in there for next winter (which is, admittedly, not a bad idea). Whatever the case, Tweety Bird, you need to step away from the cosmetic fillers, bee stings, and possibly shellfish and give your face a chance to deflate.
But not until after I clean your cuckoo clock. If you insist on maintaining your face bloat, let me offer me, myself & my fist to the cause. Slapping will put some color in your cheeks, while a serious punch or two will swell those eyes shut once and for all.
You had me at hell, no!