Sunday, January 16, 2011


As a Midwest gal now living in Seattle, I’ve learned a few things. Like, for example, that umbrellas are for rain, not sunny days and certainly not blizzards. If you live in a place that gets blanketed with snow, you should be prepared to have a few bad hair days. There’s this newfangled invention called a hat. Have you heard of it? Use one, embrace your limp locks, and take consolation in the fact that everyone else’s head looks like flat ass, too.

Just don’t pop up your parasol and take a stroll in your winter wonderland. I might have to grab your umbrella and beat you around the head, which I guarantee will give you flat hair.



mduette said...

I have fantasies of someone trying to snap open a "snowbrella" (what a fantastic word!) and it shattering like glass from the cold.

Anonymous said...

I've been following for awhile but this is easily your most insecure entry yet. You could have saved yourself several paragraphs and just typed "Dear world please look like crap so I don't throw a tantrum" I anticipate it should cover several more entries that pertain to people looking messed up so you don't whine.

I'm sure if this even makes it past comment screening a solid half dozen sycophants will rally to your side but I'm certain they'll be homely with seaweed hair and the requisite cat glasses that I'm certain you'd never want to punch in the face.I've never used an umbrella in the snow but if I did I'd feel sorry for whoever might think they have a fighting chance against an umbrella to the temple.

Zazzu said...

I guess since I live in Southern California I can say that the snowbrella thing has never, ever been on my radar. I hate snow much, MUCH more than any damn umbrella so I probably wouldn't notice anyway.

Occasionally, I see people using umbrellas as sun protection. Understandable when it's 110 degrees out and the sun is blaring.

Teresa said...

Ah, the nay sayers always sign off as anonymous, don't they?
Snowbrellas - love that name. It suits the "divas" who use them.
Get a toque eh? (that's too-ke for non-Canadians)

Lorraine said...

I'll totally rally to your side and I'm hot. And I live in South Florida so I don't have to worry about snow or snowbrellas. I do hate umbrellas in general. They are more trouble than they are worth. :)