Wednesday, September 30, 2009

Dancing baby videos



Call me a cold-hearted childless bitch, but I don’t want to see a 18-month old zipping around on roller skates when I’ve never figured out how to skate backwards (which, lemme tell you, really put a dent in my 7th grade social life). I don’t want to see a sugar-filled gang of CGI diapered gang members setting old scores through the power of breakdancing. I don’t want to see all the single babies putting their hands up, dancing in unison holding onto their Cabbage Patch Kids when I can’t do a decent cabbage patch.

The dancing baby on Ally McBeal was enough to put me into the fetal position; you can only imagine what a fleet of toddlers is doing to my delicate emotional state. It’s just not right. They're not right. Seriously, they all look a little off in the face, which gives me the willies. Is it just me, or do they all look like they've had work done?

I can’t really punch the babies, animated or no, so I am just going to take away their roller skates and dancing shoes and herd them into a giant pack ’n’ play. The time has come for a timeout.

7 comments:

Chris said...

I understand that a lot of people are bored and have to do something, but do they have to do this? Videos with babies and animals doing things they never do, or if they did, it wouldn't be for the same purpose we think they're doing them, don't interest me in the least. It's boring. Shut up with it.

I need a timeout, now. V. tired.

KimQuiltz said...

Maybe I need a black eye, but I can't help but laugh at the roller skating tykes. You have to wonder if saving the freakin' whales or something wouldn't be more....productive. *g*

Andrea said...

I'll will fully take my beating because this video cracked me up!

Red said...

I had only heard about this video, but never seen it.

It freaks me out something fierce!!

I dont want to punch the babies, but the people who thought it was a good idea, maybe?

Katherine said...

Spookaloo. Really, these babies look like the less creepy cousins of those creatures from I am Legend. If Evian made me feel like that, I may stick with tap.

Jennifer said...

This is seriously one of my most unfavorite things in the universe. It ranks up there, for me, with talking, dancing or soccer playing cows on billboards. COWS DO NOT PLAY F&#$*(&@#ING SOCCER...AND babies do not dance, or roller skate. Period.

戴佩妮Penny said...
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