Friday, June 15, 2012

Special-occasion fleece

As the curtains opened on my evening, things looked promising. I bellied up to the bar, where I was greeted by a handsome man in a natty suit. We moved on to the theater to see Lewis Black's charming and funny play, One Slight Hitch.

There was, however, one slight hitch. Actually, there were a few hundred hitches surrounding me. Men and women alike were sporting fleece vests, cargo shorts, baseball caps, polo shirts adorned with Microsoft logos, and grotty comfort sandals. The audience looked like they were ready to gut a fish, not watch a performance by professional actors (that they paid good money to experience).

Like weddings, job interviews, and black-tie galas, the theater is a special event. Like spotting a unicorn or rainbow, it's not something that happens every day, at least in my world. The theater is a reason to get dressed up, not give up. Akin to wearing pajamas as outerwear, wearing convertible pants and your favorite hoodie is a sign that you don't give a shit, either about yourself or the cultural institution. I know I live in Seattle, but for fuck's sake, people and REI employees, would it kill you to wear tinted lipgloss or pants that reach to the floor?

If you keep insisting on wearing the same garb for weeding the garden and supporting the arts, I'll have no choice but to bring the lights down on your sorry performance. And...scene.



Janet T said...

It seems that more and more people were raised by wolves, and that is an insult to the wolves, I’m sure. My son went to a wedding last summer, he was the only one of his friends to dress up and the only one who brought a gift. Don’t these people have mothers?? I work mostly in jeans, and appreciate the opportunity to dress up. Ah, the Pacific Northwest, where you get out your “dress flannel” shirt or your “good” Duck hoodie. Eugene is worse than Seattle.

Lisa said...

Yes! Being a Seattleite myself, I long to see a man in a suit on occasion. We're a culture of casual here, but it doesn't mean we should be lax on dressing up when it's right to do so. Is it really harder to put on a pair of slacks than your cruddy jeans? Buy some hose, throw on a dress (comfy!), and have some pride.

Parabolic Muse said...


I'm given to remarking on everything so there will either be a thousand more comments in your inbox, or I'll become enraged by yet another captcha code and decide to write my own blog post.

BillyK said...

Here in Queeensland Australia, the weather is opposite to yours. Formal attire for the theatre, whatever that is, is black flip-flops! My pet peeve is men on planes wearing singlets. Keep the punches going