Monday, July 16, 2012

Long toenails

Riddle me this, ladyhawke:

Are you trying to pick up small rodents during flight?

Because that’s the only reason I can imagine that you’re clicking along with those talons looping over your flip-flops like a grounded raptor.

Isn’t there a point where life and practicality might suggest that you whittle those can-openers off? Like, for instance, when putting on a closed-toe shoe? Or your basic bipedal walking?

Clip, saw, file, chew, and otherwise hack those claws off or I’m going to have to sic an actual bird of prey on your ungroomed hooves. Their beaks can clip those nails in no time.



downfromtheledge said...

Hey. Not everyone can afford an electric can opener. Loved that visual;) hehehe

One Gal's Trash said...

Wrong. Wrong. Wrong.

Yet Another Steve said...

What, other people find this hideous too? Well I never.

Anonymous said...

Extremely kissable feet. I would beg her to scratch me up with those toenails!!
Michael L. Dawley
601-260-8952 text me!!

Anonymous said...

I would really beg her!!

Anonymous said...

She will claw your eyes out.