Thursday, May 6, 2010

Burger King

I don’t know about other plebians, but I like my monarch to be regal, a bit stately even. I want them to sit on a throne, not an electric bull. I want them to issue edicts, not throw a Frisbee or work the pole. He's behaving more like the Hamburglar than a to-the-strip mall-born Burger King.

This crowned creepshow slinks around, focusing on silly shenanigans instead of smacking down insurgents and knighting rock stars like a proper king. He’s a royal pain in the ass and gives me a whopper of a stomach ache. I’d punch him in the face, but I’m pretty sure I’d hurt myself, what with the shiny, happy plastic that is his head.


9 comments:

marlono said...

AND, he's downright *creepy*.

kerry said...

I am amazed that this guy is still their mascot. He's been a creepy, lurking imitation of Jack from day one, clearly dreamt up by a twenty-something marketing genius who is probably long gone.

Yet Another Steve said...

WAY creepy. Past "bad clown" creepy. Right up there in John Wayne Gacy territory. Yeeeesh.

Fanboy Wife said...

I'm glad to know that I'm not the only one who finds the BK mascot creepy!

SkitzoLeezra said...

Creepy, perhaps.
But spry, for sho'. He's agile, I tell ya!

韋志 said...
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林60102asai_sistrunk said...
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宛蓉 said...
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Anna Ruth Roe said...

I'm scared. Very scared.